


Evans Moves in Mysterious Ways

by freyja_luna



Series: Padfoot and Prongs: An Anthology [2]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Banter, Friendship, Gen, Male Friendship, Marauders Era (Harry Potter), Marauders Friendship (Harry Potter), Teasing, goofballs
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-03
Updated: 2021-03-03
Packaged: 2021-03-15 16:27:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,466
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29811189
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/freyja_luna/pseuds/freyja_luna
Summary: James and Sirius being goofs and teasing each other in sixth year.
Relationships: Sirius Black & James Potter, Sirius Black & Remus Lupin & Peter Pettigrew & James Potter
Series: Padfoot and Prongs: An Anthology [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2190093
Kudos: 2





	Evans Moves in Mysterious Ways

Of all the bloody things that we could’ve done for detention, we had to write lines. But, I reckoned it could’ve been a lot worse, because it was a prime situation to use the two-way mirrors in. Poor Filchy had never known what he was up against, but had he ever? I yawned and tipped my chair onto its back legs, eyeing James from across the expanse of desks that Filch seemed to think could separate us. 

Filch was grumbling to himself as he read a Muggle tabloid magazine, a purring Mrs. Norris on his lap. A barest flash of light caught my eye. James was tilting his mirror back and forth under his desk so that it caught the light of the candles. 

“I mean, what was that professor thinking, making us write lines? How bloody-”

“Stupid,” I finished, grinning at James in the mirror. 

“You’d think he’d learnt his lesson last month,” he whispered, eyes bright behind his glasses. 

I snuck a glance at Filch, then looked back down to the mirror in my hand. “Reckon they’re short-staffed or didn’t have anyone else to ‘supervise’ us and that’s why it’s Filchy here,” I whispered, but still managing sarcasm on the word “supervise.” I looked at James across the room and he made the most spot-on imitation of Filch’s grouchy face. I snorted with suppressed laughter and nearly sent my chair tipping backwards. 

Filch’s greasy face peered over the top of the magazine, making said grouchy face. “If it were up to me, I’d be hanging both of you from the Dungeon ceiling. Won’t do to have you making noises in detention, eh? Or me and Mrs. Norris might bring those chains out.”

“Filchy dearest, I’ve absolutely no idea what you’re talking about,” I said, batting my eyelashes for effect. 

His face screwed up in anger and he pointed a gnarled, crooked finger at me. “Enough of the comments, Black, if you know what’s good for you.”

James laid a hand on his forehead and pretended to swoon. I lowered my head so that my hair swung forward and hid my expression from Filch. James flashed me a devil-may-care grin in the mirror before he piped up. “Uh, Filch.” His hand was raised in the air like Evans answering questions in Potions. 

“What?” he snapped. 

James squirmed in his chair. “I need to take a piss.”

I barely managed to contain my laughter. 

Filch flicked the magazine and glared. 

James laid it on really thick, writhing in his chair like he was under the effects of  _ tarantallegra _ . “Sir, I really need to take a piss.”

“Shut your mouth, Potter. You’re not in danger of exploding.” Mrs. Norris added a hiss for good measure. 

“See, that’s the thing, Filchy,” James said with a hair ruffle. “I might explode and then you’ll have to clean my remnants from the walls. That would take a bloody long time since you can’t use magic.”

He snapped his magazine closed. “One more word from you, Potter, and you’ll get the chains.”

James widened his eyes, trying to look like an innocent fawn, which only made me wheeze harder into my hands. Satisfied with his reprimand, Filch returned to his reading, leaving me and James to our mirrors. 

“Reckon Evans knows I’m in detention again?” he said, the reflection of him appearing in the mirror as he pushed his glasses up his nose

I ran a thumb along the smooth edge of my mirror. “Did you tell her?” 

“No!” he hissed, voice so quiet that Filch still hadn’t heard. 

“Then why in the bleeding fuck would she know?” I shot back with a wily grin. 

“I dunno! She’s Evans. It’s like I’m being watched by a bloody hawk.” His eyes went wide with paranoia. “What if he told her?”

“Bertram Aubrey?” I made a derisive noise. “He wasn’t in any state to talk after the illegal growth hex.”

“How would you know, Padfoot?”

“For fuck’s sake, Prongs. So what if she knows? He was being a right git and deserved it.”

James made a frustrated sound and slipped his mirror back into his trouser pocket. I glanced across the classroom to see him furiously scribbling on his parchment. Knowing him, he now had some burning need to rant to me about Evans and wanted out of the detention as soon as possible. 

It wasn’t long before he was flinging his parchment full of lines at Filch. As if either of us had meant it when we’d written, “I will not use illegal growth hexes on my fellow students” three-hundred times. That new D.A.D.A. professor really had no idea how to hand out detentions. 

James was gesturing wildly as he talked, a sure sign of an Evans-themed diatribe. “She called me an arrogant, useless toerag in Potions today. And it was completely unprompted. She just came right out and called me that. Can you believe it? I was trying to ask her how her Ancient Runes class went.”

I laughed as we climbed a flight of stairs. “How would you know she had Ancient Runes today? It’s not like she’s ever told you that.”

James paused mid-step before he started laughing. “Oh, bloody hell. Padfoot, you’re right. I’m not really supposed to know that.”

“How’d you find that out again?” I asked, glancing at the portraits that hung along the walls. 

“I think I was looking at the Map during Herbology.”

I laughed briefly as we turned a corner and went up another flight of stairs. I’d never really understood why my best friend had insisted on chasing after a girl who seemingly wanted nothing to do with him. Granted, I agreed with Remus that Evans didn’t truly despise James, but that wasn’t entirely an improvement. Unable to think of anything else, I said, “At least she hates Snivellus more than you now, Prongs.”

James clapped me on the back. “Thank Merlin for that, Padfoot. It’s not much better than before, but I’ll take what I can get.”

I rolled my eyes and ruffled the top of his head. “Are you ever going to stop going around like a lovestruck idiot?”

He laughed and tweaked his bed-head hairstyle. “No. Between the Marauders, making mischief, and Evans, I’ll never be short of things to obsess about.”

I burst out laughing. “Blimey, Prongs. Keep it in your trousers, you pervert.”

“What? You’re my best mate, aren’t I supposed to obsess about you?”

“Not like that!” 

James got me in a headlock and I hopped down the corridor under the weight of his grip, making him howl with laughter. “Oh, Padfoot dearest, don’t you know how much I simply adore you?” he said, making snogging noises. 

“Get off me, you sod!”

He let go of me with one last ruffle of my hair. We started up another flight of stairs. “I mean, Evans is great and all that, but you, and Moony and Wormtail are number one in my heart, so it’s not like you have to be jealous.”

I grinned and jostled him. “Me? Jealous? Are you really talking about Padfoot? Or is it Wormtail you’re talking about?”

“I’m talking about you, you mangy dog!” 

“You are? Really?”

“You’re a stubborn, proud hippogriff, you know that?”

“You keep saying that, but last time I checked I don’t have wings and a beak.”

“Come off it, you know what I meant, Padfoot,” James said, laughing. 

We tumbled through the portrait hole and into the Common Room still laughing, and I was in the middle of making some joke when James stopped dead in his tracks. 

“Oh, hello, Evans,” he stuttered, standing up straighter. Had his voice gotten deeper?

She folded her arms across her chest, clearly on her way to some all-important business. “Potter. Black,” she said with undisguised reproach. 

“No need to sound so irritated, love,” I drawled. 

James giggled and gave me a light whack upside the head. “Stop it, Padfoot.”

“Oh no, am I embarrassing you, Prongs?” I began making snogging noises in his ear, which made him snicker. 

“Real mature, you two,” she snapped as she sashayed by us. 

James spun around to watch her leave. “Oi! See you ’round, Evans!”

Her response was an angry gesture over her shoulder and what sounded like a harrumph. 

James mussed my hair so that it mirrored his. “Pleased with yourself, you tosser? You like embarrassing me in front of Evans?”

I laughed and whacked him on the arm. “I’m your best mate, it’s my duty.”

We descended into loud guffaws as we raced up the dormitory steps, shoving each other the whole way. Even if James’s conversation with Lily Evans had been a flop, at least we could take the piss and laugh about it together like we always did. 


End file.
